My mother lived in Canon City, CO for many years. It’s a lovely, sleepy, small town at the base of beautiful mountains. Hundreds of students have been implicated in felony 3 transmission and possession of child porn. The conversation is how to assign the label “sex offender” to so many students. Statistics reveal 2/3 of students engage in porn. I am reposting an earlier blog on porn blocking software. This is one means to help our children. We are taking aim at cybersex. 60-70% of male churchgoers use porn. 40-50% of females. The average age of the first time porn user is 10, fourth grade. When a partner discovers porn on a spouse’s computer the post traumatic impact is the equivalent to the experience of rape or sexual assault. (IITAP, CSAT Module 2) Here are some porn blockers you may want to try. I have “NetNanny”. It’s a lame name, but comes highly recommended. “Net Nanny, $39.99, available on Windows, MacOS, Android, and iOS devices: Net Nanny has been at or near the top of the parental control software ratings right from the start. The filtering and blocking features offered by Net Nanny are versatile and effective, as are the recording and reporting features. There is no screenshot playback, but everything else a recovering sex addict might want is included. Additionally, Net Nanny is relatively easy to install and configure, and usable on almost any device. Plus, the price is excellent.” R. Weiss COMPUTER AND SMART-PHONE SOFTWARE HELPFUL FOR SEXUAL AND ROMANTIC ADDICTION • BSecure Family Safety and Mobile Browser: http://www.bsecure.com/Products/Mobile.aspx, annual subscription fee offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features for your home computer, laptop, and mobile devices. • CovenantEyes: http://www.covenanteyes.com/, monthly subscription fee offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features for your home computer, laptop, and mobile devices. • Mobicip: http://www.mobicip.com/, for a one-time download charge and a modest annual subscription fee you get a “Safari-clone” replacement browser for your mobile devices with customizable Internet filtering and accountability features. • SafeEyes Mobile: http://www.internetsafety.com/safe-eyes-mobile-iphone.php, for a one-time download charge you get a replacement browser for your iOS mobile device that offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features. Only available for iOS devices (iPhone, iPad, etc.).

Do you ever reflect on the value of Godly healthy sexuality? How does one put a price tag on the soul, relationship with God and each other? Here are some interesting stats on the cost of unhealthy sexuality and the connecting addictions. Let’s look first at lost productivity. You know, like non productive work, health care costs, sick days due to acting out. According to a 2007 study addictions cost our economy 193 billion dollars a year. On average that’s over 3 billion dollars for every state in the union. What about relationships? The average cost of a trial divorce is 19,600 dollars. If a divorcing couple can pull it together and settle out of court, the average cost is 14,500 dollars for out of court settlement. General wisdom for the treatment of sex addiction is 3-5 years of group work including 60 individual counseling sessions with a therapist. This is less than half the cost of a divorce settling out of court and 3 times less than going to trial. Therapist led treatment for Sex Addiction will save you a fortune in lost productivity and court costs. The value of the soul? Priceless. Addiction costs the us 193 billion a year according to a 2007 study. https://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/ondcp/Fact_Sheets/effects_of_drugs_on_economy_jw_5-24-11_0.pdf Not surprisingly, the more issues that went to trial, the more the divorce cost. The consumers who went to trial on any issue in their case reported spending an average of $19,600 in costs, including $15,800 for attorney’s fees. In contrast, costs went down for those who were able to settle their cases; consumers who settled all of their issues reported spending an average of $14,500, including $12,200 on attorney’s fees. http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/ctp/cost-of-divorce.html

7 Minute Meditation: Ever sensed your heart is stuck? Asked how you feel, you find that you are either not truthful or disconnected? Take the next 7 minutes and write every thought you have. Let me show you: “Grateful, tired, concerned, fearful, content, excited, love my family….” Do this for 7 minutes. Then, reflect on what you wrote. This is who you are right now. Alexithymia is the inability to put what is inside of you into words. A means not, lexi comes from the word for “word”, thymia is the Greek word for feeling, the inability to put words to feelings and passion. This is what many believers go through. They cannot connect the truth of who they are to their faith story. Take a few minutes, reflect, pray through it. Your heart will begin to unstick, you will connect once again. Now pray your meditation and connect with the Lord. Watch what happens within you.

Hi friends, Our faith community is experiencing unprecedented financial blessing. I wish to share for gratis the culture the Lord has crafted over the last few years with my colleagues and friends. This two hour seminar will feature 3 sections: 1)Intimate Steps to a Culture of Generosity; 2)Intimate Steps to a Generous Life; 3) Intimate Steps to Estate Planning. I will show you how to raise funds for your ministry without guilt, shame, or ripping off the general fund. This seminar utilizes evidence based theologically correct Christian fundraising through communication, social media, and estate planning. Contact me on all media venues for more information and availability for you and your staff. We sell nothing, we give generously.

The Clatsop Teen Wellness Coalition is very excited to announce The Adolescent Mind & Body Health Seminar to be hosted at the Clatsop Community College on May 8th and 9th.   The mission of our conference is to inform parents and educators about evidence-based information concerning teen health. In doing so we aim to provide the community with resources that promote wellness and safety during adolescent development and into adulthood.  The intention behind this is to educate those who hold a position of authority in the lives of teens in Clatsop County be it parents, teacher, counselors, etc.  The hope is to create healthy dialogue in the community that will foster good choices in young minds.   This conference is free to attend, pre-registration is encouraged as space is limited, to reserve a space please pre-register online at: http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/TBK8VBW .  Detailed information about the conference will also be found at the Harbor’s website or on our Facebook event page here, https://www.facebook.com/events/443758122458544/ The conference will open on May 8th from 6:00-8:30pm in Columbia Hall 219.  We will begin with a panel discussion with the follwing participants: Brian Mahoney from Clatsop County Public Health, Liz Covey a child and adolescent therapist, Ron Brown Assistant DA, Drew Herzig of the Lower Columbia Diversity Project along with other local community members. This will be followed by our keynote speaker, Dr. Glen Maiden,  a certified Sex Addiction Therapist-C, author and international speaker on recovery.  Glen will be speaking about how to connect with youth to have positive, healthy conversations about sexuality. He will also cover how to comprehend the neurobiology and modern breakthroughs in recovery of sexual obsession, which offers a foundation of hope for professionals, leaders, and clinicians. He will touch upon sex addiction, treatment and assessment options, as well as porn blocking software.

Confirmed today with Martin Hospitality, the First Annual Healthy Sexuality Workshop 9-12PM January 30, 2016 in Cannon Beach at Haystack Gardens. Do you have interest in bringing your staff to this free event to serve your family and community? This is our vision: Healthy Sexuality Workshop in Cannon Beach: Sex Addiction Tsunami: This workshop explores healthy sexuality and current trends in cybersex. Dr. Glen Maiden, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist-C, earned his doctorate in addictive systems. Glen is a 25 year addiction recovery counselor. Comprehending the neurobiology and modern breakthroughs in recovery of sexual obsession offers a foundation of hope to professionals, leaders, parents and partners in all walks of life. This 3 hour workshop will examine: Session 1: Definition of Sex as Intimacy, Current Trends in Sexual Addiction including cybersex and neurobiology, arousal template Session 2: Neural Pathways, Addiction Cycle, Addictive System, 10 Compulsive Sexual Behaviors and their healthy counterparts Session 3: How to make a sex addict, Treatment and assessment options, porn blocking software, and hope for professionals, leaders, parents, and partners. Pre register at http://www.glenmaiden.com.

The Beatitudes of Loveology: 4 Values for Children K-2nd Grade Ok, we’re taking a step. By now I trust you have protected your family and relationships with porn blocking SOFTWARE. Think of it like INSTALLING cabinet locks or putting sharp objects beyond the reach of children. Now we look at the very healthy view of sexuality for our children ages kindergarten through 2nd grade. The purpose is to go beyond deprivation and negative sex mandates to a very Biblical, Godly, positive view of connecting with God and each other. We call this, The Beatitudes of Loveology. Here are the first four values we will teach our children and grandchildren age K-2nd grade. We choose this age group because by the third grade our children will need to have guidance on pornography. The first time porn user on average is 10 years old, 4th grade. Here are the four values: 1. Love for Jesus; 2. Love for the community of the Church; 3. Healthy Touch Bad Touching Education: we do not touch children where the bathing suit covers; 4. Bullying Boundaries and Respect; Then on this foundation of Godly relationship we will build the Beatitudes of Sexology for 3rd through 6th graders. Then we build the Beatitudes of Sexology for Students and Single family members focusing on genital sexual intercourse in marriage, masturbation, serving with gifts, and conflict resolution I love your input and reflection. This is the most important work we have ever done. Here are the Beatitudes of Loveology thus far: Blessed are you who love Jesus with your whole heart. Matthew 22:37 “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and soul.” Blessed are you who love Jesus’ Church as family. Jesus said in Mark 3:34-35 “Looking about at those were sitting around Him, He said, ‘Behold my mother and my brothers! For whoever does the will of God, he is my brother, and sister, and mother'” Blessed are you who honor the image of Jesus in others. Ephesians 5:1-2 “Therefore be imitators of God as beloved children, and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you and gave Himself up for us as an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma.” This means we honor God’s image by healthy touch and avoiding bad touching. We honor the image of Jesus with respect and not bullying. Our hope is to cast the vision for a culture of healthy relationships and Sexuality. What do you think?

Becoming a community protecting our children and grandchildren from pornography requires more than porn blocking software. Our community will need to become one of depth and great intimacy with God and each other. We must “know” the Lord, and love one another as we love ourselves. Intimacy at every level. Small groups touch this intimacy. We love Jesus in our groups, and we become his heart and hands for others. We pray, we connect as friends, we empathize, we care for the poor. Do you see it? Shallow will not do. Depth of intimacy with Jesus and each other moves us to health and wholeness. This movement will by its nature transcend the most pornographic culture in human history. May I help you find a small group of depth and meaning? Connect. I will assist you. You matter. You have value to the living God.

We are taking aim at cybersex. 60-70% of male churchgoers use porn. 40-50% of females. The average age of the first time porn user is 10, fourth grade. When a partner discovers porn on a spouse’s computer the post traumatic impact is the equivalent to the experience of rape or sexual assault. (IITAP, CSAT Module 2) Here are some porn blockers you may want to try. I have “NetNanny”. It’s a lame name, but comes highly recommended. “Net Nanny, $39.99, available on Windows, MacOS, Android, and iOS devices: Net Nanny has been at or near the top of the parental control software ratings right from the start. The filtering and blocking features offered by Net Nanny are versatile and effective, as are the recording and reporting features. There is no screenshot playback, but everything else a recovering sex addict might want is included. Additionally, Net Nanny is relatively easy to install and configure, and usable on almost any device. Plus, the price is excellent.” R. Weiss COMPUTER AND SMART-PHONE SOFTWARE HELPFUL FOR SEXUAL AND ROMANTIC ADDICTION • BSecure Family Safety and Mobile Browser: http://www.bsecure.com/Products/Mobile.aspx, annual subscription fee offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features for your home computer, laptop, and mobile devices. • CovenantEyes: http://www.covenanteyes.com/, monthly subscription fee offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features for your home computer, laptop, and mobile devices. • Mobicip: http://www.mobicip.com/, for a one-time download charge and a modest annual subscription fee you get a “Safari-clone” replacement browser for your mobile devices with customizable Internet filtering and accountability features. • SafeEyes Mobile: http://www.internetsafety.com/safe-eyes-mobile-iphone.php, for a one-time download charge you get a replacement browser for your iOS mobile device that offers customizable Internet filtering and accountability features. Only available for iOS devices (iPhone, iPad, etc.).

Below you will find 6 stories we have used to heal the hurt of the heart. No separation exists between our substance abuse, relational addictions/idolatry and the connection to our story. Telling our stories, speaking the words, brings a healthy sense of control. We can pray over our story, invite a counselor or safe friend into the conversation and finally ask God to heal the trauma. Check it out, message me privately and I will help. Do you have a sexual addiction? You can draw a straight line from your destructive behaviors to story #1. Write. I will help. If you have a dual diagnosis and reflecting on your timeline may be traumatic for you, I encourage you to write in concert with your therapist. Professional counsel will assist you to go slow and take care of yourself. Some disclosures have dramatic impact before the healing begins.